Mexican-ish SALSA

Leave it to the whitest cracker in the box to start with the Mexican stuff. But you know, its cheap, it's tasty, and all the ingredients are easily found here. "Here" being anywhere in California. Except maybe Mill Valley.
We begin with the snacking cornerstone, SALSA. This is "guilt-free" so to speak, but I'm not really partial to that phrase. You shouldn't feel guilty about eating, especially if you've taken the time to make it yourself. Save the guilt for when you buy fast food or shop at Wal-Mart. Yeah, you can go ahead and feel real guilty about that. But salsa is nothing but vegetables and a bit of salt. It's a version of a salad, really. you can also tailor your lot to whatever makes you happy. If you like hot, add more pepper. Hate cilantro? Don't use it. Living on the adventurous side? Add mango or peach. If you do that, you can top fish with it. I say YOU because I'm highly allergic to mango, hence I threw the peach option in there. You won't wanna eat after seeing my mango reaction. Anyway, I do pratter on so. Let's do it.

WHITE CHICK SALSA

What's in it:
5 fresh tomatoes
1/4 of an onion (any type you like)
2 limes
Handful of cilatro
1 jalapeno or serrano chili
Salt

Get out that food processor.
The first thing you want to do is get some of the extra water out of those tomatoes. Otherwise this salsa can turn into a bit of a gazbacho. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but a dryer salsa sits more pretty on your chips. Cut the top stem or stem base off the tomatoes, then cut the tomatoes in half. Give those halves a squeeze over the compost bin. You want to get most of the seeds out. Then roughly chop them into quarters and set them aside.
Now we deal with the onions and pepper. Chop the 1/4 of an onion into a couple pieces. It just helps it chop more evenly in the food processor. Then you shall perform a little salsa trick. Rinse that onion in water for a couple seconds. It helps get rid of that zowie, overpowering onioness that can happen in salsa. Shake the water off the onion pieces and chuck it in the bowl of the food processor. Now the pepper. I cut my pepper on a paper towel so I don't permeate my cutting board with hotness. Cut the stem off and slice the pepper in half lengthwise. At this point, you have a choice. Hot or not so hot. All the heat of peppers is in the seeds and the ribs. I leave about half of mine in. The other half I scrape out. Then I cut the halfs in half to get four pieces. In the food processor it goes with the onion. WATCH OUT FOR THOSE HANDS OF YOURS. Remember that after you have touched the pepper you have burning hands of death. Don't touch your nose, your eyes, the cat, anything. Ow.
Whir the onion and pepper into a medium chop in your food processor. You don't want it to be soup, and you'll be whirring it again with the tomatoes. In fact, here we are, it's time to toss in the tomatoes. Process the tomatoes with the onion and pepper in pulses so you don't overdue it. Pulse it until it looks like salsa. Then spoon it all into a bowl.
Chop up your handful of cilantro into fine little pieces. Stir that into the bowl of salsa. I caution against putting the cilantro in the food processor. It chops it up too much and I find it harder to gauge how much you're putting in.
Now squeeze the juice of the two limes into the salsa. Last, add salt. Salt to taste, I'd be surprised if you put in more than 1/2 a teaspoon. Mix it up and dig in!

Variations on a theme:
My old housemate used to use canned tomatoes in a pinch. They even make canned tomatoes Mexican-style with spices already in there that add some good flavor. I also use tomatillos with this recipe in place of the regular tomatoes. You can dry roast these on a cookie sheet under the broiler or on a griddle on top of the stove. Try roasting the onions and pepper too, it's a nice smoky touch.